I feel like I'm in dance class right now
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
