Sponge bath it is.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
Randomize
