Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
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