so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
Randomize
