He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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