Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
Just drug him and when he wakes up say "You just woke up from a coma, we've been married for 5 years." It'll be like The Vow but fucked up.
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
