when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
So we walked by this chick's house and she starts yelling at her boyfriend "STOP HITTING ME WITH YOUR DICK"
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
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