But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
I'm on my "fiiiiirrrst" glass of wine- the quotes mean it's the last of the bottle- so I really need you to pick up your phone so we can talk about this
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
Some lady found my secret pooping bathroom at work. Do I fight her Highlander style? I made or may not be fashioning a crude sword from seat covers and toilet paper rolls.
Do it. DO IT. There can be only one.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
Randomize
