I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
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