Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
Tinder date just called. I was supposed to be there 30 minutes ago but I'm on a 27 game win streak in Park...?
Fuck that man! Tell her your dog died or something. Reschedule that shit, you can't stop 2K at a time like that. Ball is life bro... Priorities.
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
