he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize
