No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Randomize
