I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
Randomize
