Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
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