he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
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