I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
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