That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
I feel like that needs to be the last time i end a text with "fuck them i love tequila".
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
Randomize