pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
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