fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
That reminds me...we need to get swords
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
Randomize