Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
Apparently, my drunken 3AM idea of safety is to send a GPS map of my location to someone 700 miles away. Seriously considering death as a viable alternative to this hangover. Death or Yuengling.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
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