Tonight was like the Noah's Ark of alcohol. I had to have two of everything.
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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