Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
Randomize
