He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
Randomize
