i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
Randomize
