babies were throwing up all over the place
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
Randomize
