I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
Randomize
