just come out here and I will go home with you...
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
Randomize
