are you still at the devil's house?
are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
In preparation for st patty's day I finally had a shamrock shake, and I invested in an app that will apparently keep me from drunkenly texting you pictures of my tits this weekend. Please let me know if you want to not be put on the "forbidden" list!
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
Drunk me really needs to stop 1. telling every attractive dude in a relationship that monogamy isn't real 2. Proposing threesomes with them and their girlfriends
Randomize
