I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
I cant find my shoes, my wallet, or my keys, but i know where your sister is.
Buhtt sex?
So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
do herpes really smell.
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
Randomize
