i kind of just want to tell my cleaning lady I'm an alcoholic so it's not awkward when I stumble out of my room to go sit in my car for 2 hours and wait for her to finish cleaning the several empty bottles of wine in my room
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
There are so many birds around me. And squirrels. I feel like that chick from Enchanted...but like if she had a dick and made poor life decisions.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
Randomize