woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
Randomize
