I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
Randomize
