i just remebered what i did last night, i asked a homeless man on a bike "hey whatcha doin with that bike, wanna make 5 bucks?" he agreed and then rode me on his handle bars a block away to the next bar.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
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