We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
Randomize
