Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
Randomize
