You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
Today's forecast: 90% chance of bad decisions, good stories, solid new dick and artichoke pizza
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
