Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
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