Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
Randomize