it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
I can’t believe you’re letting her use the Mercedes
It seemed like a better idea while she was giving me a hand job. It’s a good thing we weren’t having sex. Who knows what I would agree to during sex
Randomize
