Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
Randomize
