Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
Sorry my hands just texted you
Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents?
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
