And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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