Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize
