Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
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