Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Randomize
