I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
Randomize
