you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
so he let me use one of the toothbrushes that came in his daughters 4 pack, purple glittery toddler toothbrush, the next time i came back his wife has used their label maker and put my name on it...
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
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