just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
Sexting Captain while emailing my eharmony match about my low key weekend is hard.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
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