I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
you're hired as official boob wrangler
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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