There's a walmart bag of my vomit outside my front door. I just really need someone to appreciate that with me.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
The adults are the big ones right?
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
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