Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
He disabled his match.com account in front of me
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
Randomize
